Our wedding anniversary was yesterday. But our marriage anniversary is today.
I know that this sounds elitist, weird, corny, and a bunch of other stuff that if I wasn't the one writing this, I would probably be rolling my eyes. Just hang tough. I promise I'll make my point.
Our wedding was wonderful, and I constantly want to relive it so we can spend time with all of our favorites again.
However, the work began this day. . . This is the first full day that we were an us. Since becoming an us, there are things that I am constantly amazed at by being married.
Sometimes marriage is like an old friend - someone that you're still conversing with at a dinner table, after your food has gone cold and the last of the wine has been consumed. A comfortable companion that you can share your laughs, your tears, your everything.
Sometimes marriage is like a stranger - someone you keep your distance from, constantly worrying about who this person is that shares a sink with you. A vagrant visitor that you don't recognize and worry you never will.
But this is the process. Neither of us are perfect, and I don't expect you to be perfect either. . . Although my track record can occasionally claim otherwise. . . Marriage is work and like Ben Affleck said at the Oscars [Which made me weep incredibly], its the best kind of work.
I've learned so much more about myself by being married to you. I've learned that I have things that I have pushed to the bottom of myself, that have been toxic to me, and to my relationships with others. I've learned that I am more capable of things than I ever thought possible. I've learned that I love learning. I've learned that I can actually cook.
I've learned that marriage is not a solution to being single, or the natural progression of a relationshop. Not that I thought that when I got married, but that it is so much more than anyone can hope for: In the hardest and in the best ways.
Gosh. There is such a beautiful paradox to marriage, that it is both full of simplicity and complexity.
And there is no other person I would want to explore this paradox with. Thanks for continually being more than I am, for carrying the banner of grace, and for keeping your promises from March 10, 2012 and all the days after. You carried me, loved me, and advocated for me, even when I didn't want you to.
Thank you for the first year of marriage.
Thank you for making my passions, curiosities, oddities and absurdities, your own.
Thank you for living your life in such a way that I am always proud of the man you are.
Thank you for choosing me.
And thank you for buying me a bowl of soup that December day.
I love you,
Your Not So New Wife.
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